Translated: Sei, MTL-sensei-tachi
Edited: Sei, Grammarly no Danna
Source: Syosetu

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Fireworks


"I'm going to go to the bathroom too."

　Yuuji-senpai said this as he followed Hasaki-senpai's back with his eyes and let go of my hand.
　I didn't want him to go.
　But in the end, I'm just a fake lover.

"...Ye~s"

　So I pushed all my frustration and anxiety away and looked away from him, unable to make eye contact with him.

"You're still the same as ever, Touka. If you were worried, why don't you just tell him straight up, "I don't want you to go", right?"

　It was my brother who put his hand on my shoulder and said in amazement.

"You're annoying. ... I mean, you noticed that she wasn't feeling well, but you didn't say anything about it. What a bad character."

“Even if I notice, it's none of my business for Kana. ... You knew this would happen when Yuuji found out, right? Why didn't Touka just talk to her?"

　My brother has a point.
　I had noticed it in the middle. So few words was all it needed.
　
　But I couldn't do that kind of unnecessary concern for Hasaki-senpai, who continued showing her affection straight away, as I was standing next to senpai, as I kept spewing lies.

"Tomoki-san is a terrible person to leave such a pretty girlfriend alone and go to another girl."

　Haa, Otome-chan said that while letting out a sigh.
　I shook my head,

"The terrible one is me..."

　I faintly muttered so.
　Otome-chan tilted her head curiously but did not say anything more to me.
　
　... Yes, it's not senpai who is terrible. It's me.
　
　He is clumsy and very kind.
　I want his kindness to be directed only to me.
　I want him to only look at me.

　But that is not possible.
　Yuuji-senpai is always misunderstood, but he is kind and warm to everyone.
　......Since he is such a senior, I'm sure I would like him.
　I wanted to be his number one, so I thought.

　But I am the one who continues to tie him up in selfish lies.
　I had fun today, and I definitely had a great summer festival with him, but.
　Seeing the downcast expression on the face of Hasaki-senpai was very distressing.

　I am not going to give up my place next to him.
　I have no intention of giving up being his number one.

　... Still, it is better to be with a girl who tells you how much she likes you straight away, like Hasaki-senpai, than with a girl who has to lie like this to be next to you.

　―Even senpai must be happy.


☆


"Sorry I kept you waiting."

　A few minutes later, Yuuji-senpai and Hasaki-senpai had returned.
　... The two of them, holding hands.

"Uwaah... Tomoki-san, you are the worst. Even though you have a girlfriend named Touka-san, you are holding hands with another girl. I have truly disappointed in you."

　Otome-chan said this to senpai with disdain.
　Even I get upset and sad when I see someone I like holding hands with another girl.
　I've noticed that it's his kindness.

“M-My legs hurt! That's why I asked Yuuji-kun to help me."

"... That's so, I get it."

　I can't say it strongly enough, and that doesn't mean I can't accept it with a smile.

"... If you keep doing things that are misunderstood, Touka-san will end up disgusted with you, you know?"

　At Otome-chan's words, senpai smiled bitterly and then responded with a few words, "I'll be careful."
　After seeing that, my brother opened his mouth.

"We have a little more time before the fireworks. Let's get a place for it."

　We nodded.
　Hasaki-senpai glanced at me and then,

"Thank you, Yuuji-kun. I'm all right now."

"Don't push yourself"

"Yeah. But thanks to you, I'm really okay."

"... I see"

　Yuuji-senpai responded to Hasaki-senpai's words with a gentle smile.

　Then we moved on and got to the plaza where there were no stalls set up in advance for people to watch the fireworks.
　Perhaps because we still had plenty of time to spare, we were able to secure a space for the five of us to sit down surprisingly easily.　
　We spread out the leisure sheets we had prepared in advance and we sat down on them.

"I'm glad we were able to secure a place."

"I guess so. Now all we have to do is sit back and wait for the fireworks."
　
　My brother and Otome-chan said so.
　Then we talked about random things until the fireworks started.
　Gradually more and more people began to gather in the surrounding area, but for some reason, however, strangely enough, only around us, people did not gather.

"... I guess I'm here making the other people uncomfortable."

　Yuuji-senpai said to himself and then stood up.

"Yuuji-senpai? What's wrong?"

　I also stand up in a hurry and ask him.

"If I were here, it would bother the others, wouldn't it? ... Let's meet up later. I'll contact you again."

　Yuuji-senpai is kind.
　So, he has a tendency to think that as long as he is the only one who suffers a loss and everything is fine, then he is happy.
　That is exactly what is happening now.

　He is big and large.
　But I call out to his somewhat lonely back.

"You're not being honest. ... If you want to be alone with me, why don't you just say so?"

"Eh? No, that's not what I meant..."

"Mou, don't be shy! With that said, we'll change places and watch the fireworks by ourselves, and we'll meet up with you later, okay?"

　I said, while holding the flustered senpai's hand, and my brother, smiled his usual smile. Otome-chan gave a disappointed look.
　Then, Hasaki-senpai stood up once, a wistful look on her face and a tremble in her voice before she said.

"...Yeah. See you later. But don't do anything weird just because it's just the two of you alone, okay!"

　In truth, she must have wanted to watch the fireworks with Yuuji-senpai as well.
　But this time, it's probably because she feels guilty that she caused trouble for senpai when senpai spotted the swelling in her leg.
　Hasaki-senpai tried to be patient and told us so.

"No, I won't."

　Yuuji-senpai says in a calm manner.
　Am I that unattractive!? Or so I thought, I was so miffed that I almost got angry, but I held back.

　... Speaking of unattractiveness, this yukata of mine.
　I still haven't gotten any praise from senpai.

　I thought so while feeling depressed, and moved side by side with him.


☆


　Soon after moving to another place with Yuuji-senpai.
　Despite being a spot with a great view, it's not that crowded.
　We found such a best spot.
　However, there is one problem, and that is...

"Hey, Touka. Here, there are only couples making out without being afraid of being seen. Let's leave as soon as possible."

　As Yuuji-senpai said, all around us are couples who are flirting.
　I didn't know it, but this place must be that kind of spot.
　
"... It's fine, we are lovers too. If we were flirting lightly, no one would suspect us."

"No, I mean, hey, you know"

　Hugging, kissing, and other daring behaviors are the norm for the lovers around us.

"...But if it's here. Everyone else is in their own world, so there's no need for senpai to avoid others like you did earlier, right?"

"... Maybe so."

　Senpai gave a wry smile and then nodded.
　After that, I ask senpai from his side.
　He looked so confused and uncomfortable with his surroundings, but to me he looked very cute.
　Seeing him like that, I boldly ask him a question.

“Senpai... do you like Hasaki-senpai?”

　When I asked him, he turned to me and then smiled calmly.


"Of course I like her."


　Looking at senpai who said so, I regretted thinking what a stupid question I had asked.
　My chest hurts and I feel sad.
　I can't say anything.

"She says she likes me. I am happy and I like her. But I'm sure my feelings are not romantic. So, right now, I can't think about being lovers with Kana. ...Besides, how can I put it? I'm scared. I can't put it into words well."

　That favor of senpai will surely turn into love with just one trigger.
　Maybe he sees her now only as a friend, but she is such a pretty, bright, hardworking person, with a great style and big bre*asts.
　I think a normal boy would fall in love with a girl like that, even if there is no trigger.

　But I'm sure.
　The favors he receives from her, senpai feels afraid of favoritism toward her.
　I don't think that's going to happen.

　I was vaguely aware of what he was afraid of.

"That is..."

　I was about to say and stop.
　It's not something I should be saying right now, that's what I thought.
　Instead,

“Isn't it because Hasaki-senpai is a stalker?”

　I said so, as if to make fun of her.

"Don't say cruel things..."

　Senpai laughs, as if in amazement.
　I also made a smile to match his tone.


DON


　And before I knew it, the sound of the fireworks was ringing in my ears.
　We looked up at each other and at the night sky.

"Oh, it's starting."

"Right. Before we know it, it's the time."

　After muttering this to each other, we both looked up at the night sky.
　No conversation for a while.
　
　When I suddenly looked around, I saw lovers cuddling up to each other while looking up at the fireworks and whispering to each other.
　I secretly looked up at Yuuji-senpai next to me and thought.　
　
　I want him to say things to me like that, to lean in close and feel each other's body warmth.

　... Even though we're not really lovers.
　I haven't even been honest about my feelings.
　So I fully understood that it was just my selfishness.

　I thought I would be grateful for the happiness of being together, like this, now.
　　
"Beautiful, isn't it?"

　While looking up at the fireworks, I said to Yuuji-senpai.

“Ah, you're right. Yes, it's beautiful, I remember."

"What did you remember?"



"I haven't told you yet, but you look good in a yukata, Touka. You look so beautiful."


　
"... Eh?"

　What did Yuuji-senpai say?
　It's not that I couldn't catch it, it's just that it was an unexpected word.
　I let out a dumbfounded voice.

"No, it's nothing. Don't worry about it."

　Yuuji-senpai said that with a somewhat embarrassed look.
　
　But... I couldn't care less.

　Regardless of the summer heat, my body was getting hot.
　My face was hot and my heart was beating so fast it was worrisome.

　And the sound of roaring fireworks being shot.
　And the glow of the lights that color the night sky.
　And lovers whispering their love to each other.

　Now I can't see them anymore.
　I can't hear them anymore now.
　It was as if there were only two people in this world, me and Yuuji-senpai―.

　The happiness of being next to senpai was no longer enough for me.

　This relationship is false.
　The words that I speak are full of lies.
　
　But only this feeling is inexplicably real.
　I can no longer hold it back.



"―I like you, Yuuji-senpai."

　　　　　
　
　I finally put into words this feeling that kept overflowing and wouldn't stop.
　Yuuji-senpai looked at me somewhat puzzled.
　
　And―.

"I'm sorry, Touka. I couldn't hear you over the noise of the fireworks."

　In the corner of my vision, a shining flower blooms in the night sky.
　I guess this continuous noise that reached our ears without pause drowned out my words.
　
　...I understand.

　For Yuuji-senpai, I was still only a part of the world that shaped him.
　Like Yuuji-senpai to me, I was not surprised that he is not equal to everything in the world.

　What I said earlier was just my illusion. I feel sorry for that, but I know I shouldn't ask even Yuuji-senpai to do that.

　Nevertheless, I once again.
　I tried to convey my feelings to him...

"Can I hold your hand?"

"...Yeah, that's right. That's more like a lover."

　In the end, I feared that this relationship would break down on the verge.
　I chose to keep the comfortable moments with my kind senpai.

　I wondered if this feeling of mine would be conveyed to him through our joined hands.
　I squeezed his big, hard hand tightly.

　I don't know if this feeling was conveyed.
　But I was embarrassed and very happy that he held it back so strongly.

　―And I can't help but hate myself for being weak and cowardly enough to think that way.

　I could not make him fall in love with me and I could not tell him how I felt.
　I mocked myself in my mind, wondering how long I was going to continue to enjoy this small happiness.



☆☆☆



"Can I hold your hand?"

　In a gentle voice she said.

"... Yeah, that's right. That's more like a lover."

　I replied and I held her hand.
　

　What were her words that were drowned out by the sound of the fireworks?
　I couldn't figure that out.

　But I'm sure she didn't mean to say she wanted to hold hands.

　Anxious, desperate.
　Seeing her faint smile, I can understand such a thing.

　But, surely, if I pursue the words.
　I had a feeling that this endlessly friendly relationship, which was convenient for me, would disappear, and I feared for it.
　So I couldn't go any deeper.

　As if sensing the uneasiness in my heart, the hand that Touka and I had held was clasped tightly and firmly.

　This "fake" lover relationship between Touka and I is like this firework that we look up at together.
　I I wanted to believe that only the moment of blossoming in the night sky was beautiful, and that what remained behind was not only a sense of loneliness―.


　I held back firmly with all my strength, as if I was clinging to the hand I was connecting with hers.