Translated: Sei, MTL-sensei-tachi
Edited: Sei, Grammarly no Danna

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Chapter 4 | Go for It | Remake our Life!


Part 5

Only Matsuhira-san and I remained in the meeting room.

At first, neither of us spoke. Matsuhira-san kept his eyes closed and didn't say anything.

(Now that it has come to this, it can't be helped, but this is awkward.)

It felt like we were both holding back, unsure of what to talk about first.

For the time being, I looked back on how the discussion had gone just now.

The upper management had ordered that the development period for the project Matsuhira-san had proposed be shortened.

However, Matsuhira-san opposed it head-on and said that he was even willing to scrap the project.

I argued that his stance was too extreme and presented a compromise.

That was the gist of it.

As for how the discussion ended, regarding what Matsuhira-san had said was impossible, I presented the argument that it was possible, and Matsuhira-san replied that he would take it into consideration.

It sounds rather conceited, but it ended up as if I was the one who had come up with a solution.

(But something feels a little strange, or rather, there's a question that's been bothering me from the start.)

Matsuhira-san is, needless to say, a very quick-witted person, and he is also considerate.

There was no way someone like him couldn't think of a compromise that someone like me could come up with on the spot. I think he probably already knew there was a way out like this.

Even so, he denied that possibility from the very beginning. In other words, more than wanting to get the project approved, there was value for him in moving forward with it in its original form.

If that was the case, then what was his objective? Who was that action meant for?

If the atmosphere allowed it, it was something I wanted to ask.

(Putting that aside, should I be the one to say something?)

I felt that I had to apologize for what happened earlier. I didn't regret honestly saying what had been on my mind, but it was also true that I had acted against Matsuhira-san's wishes.

It wouldn't have been strange if Matsuhira-san was angry about that.

"I'm sorry about what happened earlier."

When I lowered my head, Matsuhira-san opened his eyes as well.

"No, I've also reflected that I was acting too much on my own. If I had been able to give a convincing explanation, Hashiba-kun probably wouldn't have argued against me."

However, he paused there before continuing,

"But to be honest, I do think you've put me in a difficult position. Because of this, I'll be forced to change the course of what I had been planning."

"Uhm, if there's anything I can do..."

Just as I was about to say I'll do it, Matsuhira-san spoke over me,

"I should have explained it to you properly. I should have asked for your help during the preparation stage much earlier."

"Explained it?"

What was he talking about? Did he have something else in mind besides that project? Was it a completely different game project, or...

However, what Matsuhira-san said next was shocking in a completely different way.

"You see, I'm the son of Matsuhira Tadahiro, the president of Succeed Soft."

"...I-I see."

When I was hired as a part-timer, I had noticed the president's surname. Since it was an uncommon surname, I had wondered if maybe... and it turned out I was right.

"You thought it was strange that, even though I was just a part-timer, I was being entrusted with such important work, didn't you? In short, it was all because of my family connections."

He said it with a self-mocking tone, but I didn't see it that way.

Matsuhira-san's ability in practical work far surpassed that of the other part-timers and even the full-time employees. That's why I thought it was only natural that he was entrusted with important work, not because of favoritism.

"I never thought you got where you are just because of your family connections."

"Thank you. But other people didn't see it that way. In fact, many people said behind my back that becoming the next president was already a done deal."

It seemed he really had struggled because of that.

"But you know, I don't want to become the successor of Succeed Soft as it is now."

"Eh, why...?"

Back then, Succeed Soft wasn't a publicly listed company, but considering its sales and the attention it received in the industry, it was growing fast and was seen as a promising company.

That's why I naturally thought that being able to take over the company was something anyone would envy.

"Is it because of... the whole family connections thing?"

"That's part of it. But what I hated even more was how old-fashioned the company's system and way of thinking were."

He said it as if he were spitting the words out.

"My father grew the company through the old way of making games, so he's convinced that the same approach will always work. That's why it became the kind of company where working overtime is simply expected, and where some people push themselves until they ruin their health. The company may have grown bigger on the outside, but on the inside, it's no different from a college club."

It was painful to hear. The company I worked for ten years later was exactly the kind of company that seemed to have gathered only the worst parts of that.

"So I decided to change this company. I asked the employees for their cooperation too, but Horii-san was the only one who was willing to really listen to me."

I see. So that was why he was often with Horii-san.

"But that was enough. I thought that if I created the project, completed it under a schedule with enough room, and made it profitable, no one would have anything to complain about, and I'd be able to change the company's way of doing things."

Looking frustrated, Matsuhira-san slammed the project proposal onto the desk.

"And yet, the board members said this schedule still had room to be tightened. When I argued back, they said, 'The young master still doesn't know what it's like at a real development site.' What a ridiculous thing to say! I made this plan because I worked alongside everyone and saw so many people who couldn't even go home. They're the ones who don't understand anything."

He spoke with strong emotion, something I could never have imagined from the Matsuhira-san I knew.

I had worked at a black company myself, so just knowing there was someone like Matsuhira-san who thought this way made me feel relieved.

"That's why I didn't want to compromise on that project. I already knew that the schedule could be adjusted by reducing the buffer, and that the upper management would probably agree to those changes."

So I was right. He knew all along and intended to reject it anyway.

"I know I put you in a difficult position, and I'm sorry for that. But I'm not acting just for the sake of this one project. I'm thinking beyond that, with the future of game development in mind."

A tense silence filled the room.

Matsuhira-san's tone was as calm as ever, yet every time he spoke, it almost felt as if the air in the room was growing thinner.

"I want to make game development an ordinary job."

Matsuhira-san spoke quietly.

"People dress it up with special words like creative and treat it as if it's some kind of sacred place. Because of that, they try to force working hours and working conditions that would never be accepted in a normal job. I want to put an end to that."

That way of speaking made it clear that Succeed Soft had probably been that kind of company until now.

"Even for us creators, because we enjoy it, we end up spending too much time on our work. We use the time that we should be resting to keep working instead. We may feel excited and enjoy ourselves at the time, but it always comes back as damage to our bodies."

It was painful to hear. If it meant making something good, we wouldn't hesitate to spend time and effort on it. At first glance, that sounds like a good thing to say, but it's also a way of working that ignores the limits of the people creating it. In fact, Shinoaki had pushed herself that way and eventually collapsed from poor health.

"——That's why I want to change it."

He looked straight at me.

"I want to completely change the working environment for the people here by making it a well-organized job with fixed working hours, like being a civil servant or working in a factory. That's my ideal. And since the first step is right here, I don't want to compromise, and I want to find more people who share the same goal."

His tone was filled with a strong determination.

"Would you support me, Hashiba-kun?"

Matsuhira-san took one step closer toward me.

What I had done back then, raising my voice in that situation—I don't think it was wrong.

It was entirely possible for deadlines and conditions to change due to circumstances within an organization, and abandoning the entire project because of that would be unfair to the people who had been involved.

Especially if, as Matsuhira-san said, his act of opposing them was deeply connected to his beliefs.

That was what made me question whether my actions had been insincere.

(But Matsuhira-san is trying to change the customs that have existed until now.)

The things I thought were common sense. The things I thought were within an acceptable range.

Matsuhira-san was saying that all of those things were not suitable as conditions for creators. He wanted to completely change this mistaken idea from the very roots—the idea that people in charge could impose their will from above and hurt the people who actually create things.

What came to my mind were Yuu-kun's words.

His desperate wish for someone to help his family. I had promised to make that happen.

The person standing in front of me now was trying to make that wish come true through the system itself. Even though he was around the same age as me.

I took a deep breath and made up my mind.

"I understand. I withdraw my opinion. I will... support you, Matsuhira-san."

This person could be trusted. He had an ideology worth believing in.

At my words, Matsuhira-san showed a bright smile,

"Thank you. I believed that you would understand."

Then, he reached out his hand toward me.

When I took his hand, he placed his other hand over ours from above.

"Leave it to me. I'll make sure to explain things properly to the people above us. I won't let this cause you any trouble, so keep working without worrying."

"Yes..."

My heart felt warm.

That's right, before being a creator, I am someone who works at a company.

If we don't change that environment, then my projects might not even be able to succeed.

——— read on seireitranslations.blogspot.com ———

Part 6

After that, Matsuhira-san's project was explained to the development team by him once again, and the decision was made to bring it back to the upper management with the cancellation of the project as the basic stance. Since I also supported him, the overall opinion shifted greatly in favor of Matsuhira-san.

Although there were still objections, Matsuhira-san carefully explained each and every one of them, and only after there were no remaining opposing opinions did he bring it back as the collective decision.

Even while handling his regular work, I thought he had an incredible amount of energy.

(He really is an amazing person)

Once again, I felt a sense of respect for Matsuhira-san.

"Paisen, do you think Matsuhira-san has already given up on the project?"

Takenaka-san also seemed concerned and asked me that.

"I wonder. He must have been attached to it while he was making it, but now he's working as if nothing ever happened..."

In reality, during his usual work, Matsuhira-san had returned to acting the same as before, so much that it felt like the incident in the meeting room had been a lie.

"If that's the case, he's really amazing"

Beside Takenaka-san, who spoke with admiration, I found myself a little concerned about Matsuhira-san.

Was this really the right thing to do?

And what was he really thinking deep down?

(The only person who probably knows is that person.)

It was just lunchtime. I went over to where Department Head Horii was sitting and asked if he wanted to have lunch together.

“It's rare for you to invite me,” Horii-san said, but he happily agreed to join me.

Then, when I asked Horii-san directly,

"That's a difficult question. To be honest, there are some things I can't answer here."

"I see..."

Just as I expected, I wasn't able to learn much about what Matsuhira-san was thinking when he made this decision.

"As for the way people work in this industry... he has his own feelings about it, so I suppose it can't be helped."

However, there was no doubt that there was some kind of reason behind it.

"But... I can't ask about that, right?"

"It's something personal. So I can't tell you myself."

Saying that, he shook his head.

"But if it becomes necessary, I think he'll tell you himself. Because."

Horii-san smiled,

"It seems that Matsuhira-kun really thinks highly of you. Sooner or later, I think he might come and talk to you himself."

"I-I see."

"Yeah. He said that Hashiba-kun has a power to draw people in, something I don't have, and that he really envies that about you. He also highly values the way you work."

That was surprising as well.

To think that someone as talented as him had those kinds of feelings toward me. That alone gave me confidence, but it also became a source of pressure.

"...That is exactly why I have something I want to ask of you, Hashiba-kun."

"What is it?"

Horii-san looked at me with a lonely expression,

"Matsuhira-kun is alone. So from now on as well, please continue to get along with him."

"......!"

Matsuhira-san's position and his beliefs.

Even without thinking about it again, there was no doubt that he must have been lonely.

And yet, Matsuhira-san was trying to bring about change. Even though it might only make him even more isolated, he refused to give in.

When I was working at a black company, I had no one on my side. No matter how much I talked about improving work processes and raising the quality of our products, the president wouldn't listen, and my coworkers had already given up, only laughing coldly at me whenever I tried to talk seriously.

Fighting alone is just too painful.

That's why I understand how difficult it must be for Matsuhira-san as well.

(Can someone like me really be of help to someone as amazing as him?)

When it came to creativity, when it came to work... in every aspect, I felt like I couldn't catch up to him, even with the ten years of experience I had from the future.

But if he valued someone like me...

"I understand. If it's something I can do...But..."

I wanted to answer his feelings.

"Thank you. It has to be you."

Horii-san said that and nodded at me.

——— read on seireitranslations.blogspot.com ———

Part 7

That day as well, after finishing our work, Takenaka-san and I were walking home.

"Good work today, too. Thanks to all your hard work, we’re making good progress, Takenaka-san."

"Seriously!? Eh, I’m really happy! When I get home today, I’m going to secretly have a little celebration by myself! With cola!"

Takenaka-san was happily spinning around in place.

It wasn’t flattery or anything like that; the mini-game development was, in many ways, being held together thanks to Takenaka-san.

She was rapidly finishing one piece of art material after another that we couldn’t outsource due to resource and budget issues. It would not be an exaggeration to say that she was doing the work of several people.

Putting aside whether she could make a living as an artist, there was no doubt that she would never have to worry about finding work. She was that capable in every area.

(She’s definitely a rare talent.)

Everything I could do only half-decently, this girl was replacing with her own abilities at a high level in every respect.

I was once again reminded of why Kano-sensei had introduced her to me.

But when I thought back to my conversation with Matsuhira-san, I also felt that making sure someone special like her was not simply taken for granted was probably necessary to change the game development industry.

If a project would fall apart without her, then as long as we continued working in a way where everything depended on people like her, the industry would remain stuck in the past forever.

"Hey, hey, Paisen, do you enjoy making a game with Takenaka?"

Takenaka-san suddenly lowered her voice and asked me that.

"Eh? What’s with the sudden question?"

"Well, you know~ What we’re doing now is, of course, something we also do because we like it, but basically, it’s something the company told us to do, or rather, it’s part of our job, right?"

Of course, she was right.

"But Paisen has always made things based on ideas you came up with yourself, together with people you chose yourself, so I was wondering how this compares to those projects~. I’m just curious!!"

I see. Indeed, I can understand feeling a little uneasy, or wondering what I think about it.

"Of course, it’s fun."

Those were words without a trace of dishonesty.

"Takenaka-san has her own ideas, and whenever I tell her to do something or give her instructions, she thinks about them again and comes back with suggestions like, ‘Let’s do it this way,’ or ‘How about doing it like this?’ So I’m always looking forward to seeing what she’ll come up with next."

I looked at her and nodded firmly.

"What we’re doing is work, but it’s something I want to do, at least for me."

Takenaka-san reacted happily to my words.

"I seeee, that makes me really happy!"

She spread both arms and gave a little hop, then said,

"But somehow, Takenaka feels a little lonely"

She continued in an oddly solemn tone.

"Lonely?"

"Hmm, I’m suuuper happy that I can work with Paisen like this right now, but somehow, it feels like everything is confined to just this place. No matter what I do, it doesn’t really go anywhere."

Then she turned around to face me with a quick spin and gave me a big grin.

"Hey, Paisen. I really do want to work on some kind of project!"

"I figured you’d say that."

But somewhere inside, I had been thinking the same thing.

It felt like such a waste to use someone with talent like hers in a jack-of-all-trades role like this. I wanted to give her a bigger, more solid stage to work on.

But I don’t have that kind of power right now.

"Sorry. I wish I had more power or money."

They were pathetic words, but they were also an undeniable fact.

I couldn’t even push through with my own ego, and my arguments were not entirely consistent either.

Despite having more experience than other people, I wasn’t making full use of it.

That was who I was right now.

I wasn’t someone with a philosophy like Matsuhira-san, nor was I someone who devoted himself single-mindedly to creative work.

When I said that a little dejectedly, Takenaka-san looked surprised.

"Eh? Wait, no, Takenaka doesn’t expect Paisen to launch some huge project for her right away!!"

"Eh, you don’t?"

I had assumed that was what she was asking of me.

"Well, sure, if there’s an opportunity, I’d love to jump on it, but Paisen is a university student too. I know it’s impossible to do something like that right away. But......"

"But?"

Takenaka-san suddenly came closer to me and said,

"We can always come up with a new project we want to work on!"

She said it energetically.

"Eh? A project... well, I guess so."

Indeed, regardless of whether it would actually come to fruition, there was nothing stopping us from coming up with a project at any time.

"We can already see the end of the mini-game development, and we’ll have more time, right? So let’s think about it in between, Paisen! A project for Paisen and those sparkling senpais!"

I see. She was right.

I had lost some of my enthusiasm because of what happened with Shinoaki and my conversation with Matsuhira-san, but thinking about what lay ahead, there was nothing wrong with working out a project in advance.

Not just a vague philosophy of production, but a project that we would all create together someday. Something that would show what it is that I want to create.

It was precisely because it was now that doing it mattered.

"Thank you, Takenaka-san. Thanks to you, I’ve found something I want to do."

"Wah! Paisen thanked me again! Just how happy is Takenaka going to be today!!"

As the talented junior in front of me began spinning around again.

I decided to slowly start thinking about the concept for the project.

——— read on seireitranslations.blogspot.com ———

Part 8

I should never become a manager.

Whenever I met and talked with Kano-kun, the conversation almost always ended up on that topic.

I originally joined a game company because I wanted to work in development, but lately, all I did was stare at schedule sheets, glare at budget sheets, and spend the rest of my time making phone calls and sending emails. As for actual development work, I ended up starting it only after regular working hours were over.

Besides, ever since I joined the company, I had known all too well how difficult being a manager was. When I was just a regular employee, I had watched a supervisor I respected wear himself down, and I had told myself that I would never become like that.

Or at least, that was what I had thought. But when that very person himself told me, “I’m counting on you next,” I couldn’t bring myself to refuse.

But even so, there were things about managing the development team that I found enjoyable. It was lonely not being able to stand on the front lines of development myself, but in my place, my talented colleagues and subordinates created good things. Being able to build the foundation that made that possible was meaningful enough.

But now.

I regretted it all over again. I should never have become a manager.

"President"

The man standing before me was my former, once-respected superior.

It was nighttime in the president’s office. I had been summoned and was standing before the president, my former superior. No, “standing there frozen” might have been a more fitting description.

That was how painful the fact I had just been told was.

"So you’re saying that you have no intention of reversing the decision you’ve made?"

I realized that the words I had spoken to confirm it were trembling.

"Horii, you’re being repetitive."

The president turned his chair toward me and stared straight through me with eyes that had grown sharper than before.

"Make Kou stop the foolish thing he’s doing. That is all I have to say."

"So if that doesn’t happen, you’ll replace the person in charge of the project and expel Kou-kun."

There was no reply. That silence was the most eloquent answer of all.

"Do you understand why things have come to this, President?"

"I don’t. How am I supposed to know what that fool is thinking?"

"No, you do understand. You’re just pretending that you don’t!"

My voice grew louder. I had intended to speak as calmly as possible, but whenever it came to this, I just couldn’t help becoming harsh.

That was how important it was to me—or rather, to all of us.

"Development is... exhausted."

I thought of everyone’s faces. Some of them looked happy, but every single one of them was troubled, saddened, and above all, completely worn out.

"Kou-kun knows that too, which is why he submitted that project proposal in the first place. And when he was ordered to shorten the schedule as if to force him into submission, he refused. You must understand that much too, President."

The president snorted,

"That boy is too naive. He comes barging in with some half-baked knowledge he picked up somewhere about things like working conditions, then has the nerve to say that this is the ideal. It’s an unrealistic, armchair theory. There’s no reason to take it into consideration."

"No way..."

When I was left speechless, the president pressed on.

"This is my company. If you don’t like the way I do things, then you can go work somewhere else. Whether it’s you or Kou, it’s the same."

Was this really the same superior who had once struggled alongside me and shed tears with me?

It was precisely because we had gone through those experiences together that I thought something might change if I talked to him. That was why I had come here. But it seemed that gamble had failed.

"President... you’ve changed?" 

I clenched my fists.

I could feel my bones creaking as I squeezed them, making a grinding sound.

"Ever since that person was gone, you’ve changed. You say that we’re being bound by a ghost, but you’re the one being bound by one!"

"Watch your mouth, Horii. Think about your position."

I swallowed my words.

"Tell Kou this. If he wants my forgiveness, he is to come here, prostrate himself before me, and apologize. And tell him never to speak out of line again. If he can’t do those two things, I’ll go and put an end to this myself."

Truly, I should never have become a manager.

(Kou-kun... I’m sorry. It looks like this is the limit of what I can do.)